Was I depressed or just bored? Or was it something else... I've been both of those before and this feels different...
There are plenty of things to do if I'm bored and plenty of things to be happy about if I'm depressed and these feelings definitely don't feel as low vibe as they did in the past... They don't feel hopeless. I don't feel like I'm drowning. I just don't feel that 'low'... And then I realised...
I'm in the 'Void' - I've never been here before but I've heard about it.
It's that place you go when you've released your attachments to 'doing', 'achieving', 'distracting' and 'things'... the vast, open plains of space and nothingness. Where life begins again but from a different foundation.
It's a weird place to be... kinda lonely and totally unknown, yet full of possibility.
The 'ego' or the 'human' part of me wants to know what it is all about, why it is happening, how long it will go for and what comes next - it wants answers and has lots of questions constantly... but there are no answers in the void. There is only allowing, trust, letting go and letting the flow of the now take you.
The flow seems to be taking me places that are creating heaps of resistance in me. Places I've been before that I need to revisit to go finally beyond.
Clearly the Void is the 'final frontier' where you release all those last little bits before stepping into the great unknown once and for all.
It's crazy to me that there is still more to release when I feel like I've already done lifetimes worth of it. But I understand now... you cannot go beyond this point with any heavy baggage.
In the Void you have an opportunity to re-experience past traumas, situations or beliefs from an observational perspective rather than through reliving it. From this vantage point you can take in multiple angles and form a deeper understanding from an unattached perspective - not to change the past, but to forgive it by understanding it.
It is important to remember that we experience life as we are not as it is which is why our relationship to life changes over time as we do.
When you find yourself in this space one day - which, if you are reading this, then it is inevitable - know that it is perfect. You are exactly where you are meant to be.
The life experiences you are having, whilst they maybe uncomfortable are actually guiding you down the perfect path towards different ways of thinking and of new ways of being - if you had continued living life like you always had, you would miss this...
Some examples:
• Money: you have just enough to live on and nothing more, you know you are worthy but still you live off 'just enough'. This is not because of your mindset or worthiness anymore (you have gone beyond that), but rather an opportunity to change your relationship once and for all with money + having less money means you make different choices and it's these new choices that form the new path without the heavy baggage.
• Food: the food you once loved becomes unavailable or no longer sits right with you. You have healed your relationship with food, so it is no longer this... now it is about making new choices and approaching general nourishment from a new perspective... an opportunity to get to know the body even more and to review your food choices for alignment and new opportunities.
• Physical: tiredness feels like a burden and it feels like it's been an eternity since you had energy... but you have gone beyond all the old reasons for your tiredness... now you can see it for the gift it is. To slow down, rest, be present with your body and mind. To make different choices and ONLY those that feel good for you physically... something that takes a lot of time for people to learn but is of such great benefit!
The Void is an opportunity to make different choices. Notice where there is resistance or questioning and find ways to release this into a space of allowing and curiosity. Consciously learn to see the perfection in all of your experiences even if you don't know what 'good' is coming from them.
There will be signs and synchronicities that validate this perfection for you.
This message is to me as much as it is to you... a reminder to trust and allow.
To release your ideas about how it should or could be and to just allow the flow to take you...
To know that all is well in all of creation, always.